E2 - THE IMPERFECTION OF VALUING PERFECTION

Your team lost 4-3;

You feel disappointed, sad, and frustrated with yourself;

You carried this feeling all week until your next game;

You often managed this self-strategy to discipline yourself;

The reason to do so resides in getting better even if it seems disagreeable to do so.

You always played great the next game when you told yourself to be better. Since it appeared to be the case, you did not manage to try another strategy and kept it that way. But the feeling of losing and giving yourself the responsibility of losing the game is heavy on your shoulders—more than you would imagine.

This is how most goaltenders perceive the game; most goals are allowed because you let them go in, you misperceived the situation, and your opponents took advantage of it. It is rarely the players’ skills that allowed them to score. You take ownership of the situation, but it holds a double-edge knife.

You take the blame most of the time. It seems only natural to do so. You feel this inner part of you that always wants to be perfect. But, do you need to always blame yourself and keep the responsibility on your shoulder? Maybe not.

Perfectionism has been interpreted exclusively as unfavorable. Only recently, there has been some evidence that presents perfectionism as positive (Stoeber & Otto, 2006).

Perfectionism is a part of someone’s characteristic defined by setting substantial standards for themselves to strive in a value-performant environment as an evaluation assessment (Stoeber, 2011).

Whether you may have realized it or not, you set yourself evaluative standards on how you should perform. It includes your game’s components that you can distinguish easily and provide insights of your performance. In goaltending, you will most often use goals, final scores and results as evaluative insights into your performance.

As you set yourself standards in the past, there is a process to interpret this aspect of your mind. Every goaltender must be a perfectionist or have some characteristic within them. Perfectionism has been clarified to two extents. The first part is perfectionist strivings. It portrays the high standards that one would set for their performance. The second aspect of perfectionism is perfectionist concerns which display one’s concerns over performance. It is the discrepancy between how you would expect to play and how you play. This sense of unease may bring fear, a negative view of oneself and perpetual concerns over making mistakes.

Being a perfectionist is managing these two aspects of the mind. And there is a healthy way of addressing this mindset. A healthy perfectionist has been presented with a high sense of perfectionist striving while having a lower sense of perfectionist concerns (Stoeber & Otto, 2006).

This mindset comes from the understanding that error is unavoidable and will happen in a game of hockey (Hamachek, 1978).

A healthy perfectionist may understand perfectionism as a task and focus on what should be achieved in the presented scheme. On the other hand, someone with more perfectionist concerns may give strict criteria to excel. And unfortunately being a goaltender in hockey isn’t something that can be error-free. Most goaltenders implement a mindset that would intensify concerns, yet goals and errors are unavoidable. It is a part of the game.

Some of the perfectionist characteristics relate to ego. Surprisingly. And relying too much on ego may lead to a self-critic pattern to achieve unreachable standards (Hamacheck, 1978). There is undoubtedly an unhealthy relationship that can be undertaken with perfectionism.

An unhealthy perfectionist will aspire for perfection by refusing to accept any lower performance as it will indulge their substandard performance when it occurs. This indulgence can be experienced with obsession over performance.

Focus then is directed on the result instead of your actions and progressions.

Unhealthy perfectionists put energy towards frustration based on results and are misguided by this perfectionism misunderstanding. Results make it delusional about performance being good or bad.

As you recognize this unhealthy perfectionist characteristic from reflecting on your frustration and seeing the importance you put on results instead of your practice, you may come closer to getting to a healthy relationship about perfectionism. Healthy perfectionists have been presented with three main aspects to establish within themselves. These aspects are well represented for goaltenders as they should stick to them if they want to sustain a good relationship with their perfectionist characteristics.

Be Realistic And Rational With Your Expectations

It is about accepting what happens. Accept the events, take elements of training that need further attention by seeing what you did in your last performance. Understand your game will never be perfect; your progression will make you feel excellent, and progress brings a sense of fulfillment, not the result.

Being rational about your expectations is bringing your focus to improve, not whether you won your game. This rationality will make you feel in control and confident in your way of playing.

You are not pushing yourself worse when you accept a goal or a loss.

Goaltenders must be ready to fail, and it should be visited as a normality to develop within a healthy progression. A healthy perfectionist understands that mistakes will be caused along the way with effort and performance (Hamachek, 1978). Accepting this aspect of your game will only make you foresee your progress with excitement. You will become confident in your development, starting with being realistic and rational about what you expect from yourself.

Approve Yourself and Others Should Follow

Goaltenders are subject to talkative opinions since they are on the lookout by everyone attending the game. A healthy perfectionist has been presented to view the approval from others as an additional good feeling adding to theirs (Hamachek, 1978). Goaltenders should have a high level of self-acceptance even when expectations of others are not fulfilled. This aspect of healthy perfectionism is about standing insensitive over socially based criticism (Lundh, 2004), while consenting to the praise of others when presented. Whether you are satisfied with your performance, that remains your view of things, others encouraging your game are perceiving your potential.

If you accept what you expect from yourself, you will further acknowledge what others praise you.

Your game results do not mean you can’t enjoy your performance; falling short of your expected performance may only clarify what needs to be practiced and feeling enthusiastic about it.

Detachment

Healthy perfectionists have a deep sense of self-worth (Gotwals, 2015). And self-worth may not always come from achievement. Your character continues to live if your performance differs from how you imagine it to finish (Hamachek, 1978). The results may be disappointing at the moment, but keep in mind that everyone has time for success. Your time will come. And it is a reminder at that moment to keep building what you have done in the past and continue to grow your character.

This way of perceiving your performance makes it a challenge to your goaltending skills instead of a threat to your concept of self.

This threat to your concept of self is built over time in an achievement context as you are always reminded of your shot counts. Progressing through this challenge starts with how you

view yourself in goaltending, and it shouldn’t be seen as a threat to play but as a joyful game.

Getting There

Goaltending is a position that demands near perfection. It is then normal that goaltenders rarely feel satisfied since they are forced to play an error-free game. Is it healthy? It is definitely a detrimental relationship that can be developed within oneself. If mismanaged or misinterpreted, this mindset can lead to burnout and even quitting (Gotwals, 2011). Goaltenders have numerous technical details to consider, from which each movement cannot be overlooked. The puck is so small, and the game gets so fast that there is little margin of error. A goaltender must therefore condition and master a complex practice while dealing with a chaotic environment.

Being a healthy perfectionist strengthens the goaltending mindset. It supports the perception of seeing their engagement on the ice as personally meaningful but not self-defining.

This healthy way of thinking isn’t something that can be shifted overnight. It is something that must be worked on over time. You must be conscious of it whenever you catch on to perfectionist habits. It is a discipline of great reflection. It requires much effort, but it is worth every thought. You want to perform at your best, and if you can do it while remaining healthy and good for your character, it is not better but essential for your mental health.

References

Gotwals, John K. “Perfectionism and Burnout within Intercollegiate Sport: A Person-Oriented Approach.” The Sport Psychologist, vol. 25, no. 4, Dec. 2011, pp. 489–510.

Hamachek, D. E. Psychodynamics of normal and neurotic perfectionism. Psychology, 1978, 15, 27-33.

Lundh, L.-G. Perfectionism and acceptance. Journal of Rational-Emotive & Cognitive-Behavior Therapy, 2004. 22.

Stoeber, Joachim. “The Dual Nature of Perfectionism in Sports: Relationships with Emotion, Motivation, and Performance.” International Review of Sport and Exercise Psychology, vol. 4, no. 2, Sept. 2011, pp. 128–45.

Stoeber, Joachim, and Kathleen Otto. “Positive Conceptions of Perfectionism: Approaches, Evidence, Challenges.” Personality and Social Psychology Review, vol. 10, no. 4, Nov. 2006, pp. 295–319.